I'm Sure I was Served by Vicky Pollard in the Chemist

Now for those who are unaware of Vicky Pollard she's the teenage yob from the comedy show Little Britain. Not that I'm suggesting that all teenagers have that "not bovered" attitude, perhaps only 98% of them.

Thanks to my doctors persistence to give me yet another prescription I made my way to the local chemists where I have become part of their family having visited so often. I'm usually greeted with a warm welcome by familiar faces, but on this occasion there was someone new behind the counter.

It didn't start well as she pointed to my prescription with her half peeled nail varnished finger and uttered the words "Sign it". Now to be fair the chemist had tried their best in upgrading this youth, a smart chocolate coloured overall unfortunately couldn't hide the skin tight cut off black legging and string tatty sandals protruding from under the garment.

"Are yous waiting or coming back", was the next question to which I indicated that I would wait. "It ill be 25 minutes then.". Not to be beaten I slowly rotated 360 degrees to look at the queue and count the customers and instantly came to the answer, nobody else was in the shop. "Well I better go up to the town then" I replied but her next question through me for a bit. "How long's u's going to be", I couldn't resist it but paused in thought for a few seconds and replied slowly, "Well about 25 minutes". You could hear and see the sniggering from the pharmacist on the other side of the partition.

On my return to the chemist I walk in, jestered to the assistant and said "You've just cost me £13.75". I know I had the interest of all the staff at this point as she replied "Whyyyyy, what did I do". In my hands were two full carrier bags marked Wilkinsons where I had gone, "You gave me 25 minutes to go shopping" I growled.

She finally gave me my small packet of tablets after I had to give her lots of personal information, name address, inside leg measurement etc. Now, do I go back next time and hope she not there, or do I go to the other chemists that can never find my prescription anyway. I'll just keep taking the tablets.